The Great First Tracks, v. IV: "A Salty Salute" by Guided by Voices

1 minute, 29 seconds that introduced me to Guided by Voices during my first year of college. The first track on their 1995 masterpiece, Alien Lanes. Some people think the masterpiece is 1994's Bee Thousand, but some people also thought Tito successfully defeated Balkan nationalism. Not that I'm talking smack about a fine album, incidentally.

I was just coming off my weird in between years...I wasn't following punk anymore, had listened to early Bob Dylan and Pogues records virtually exclusively for a year and a half. But I was getting bored with my music and didn't know where to turn...the occassional pop punk album I bought during that weird first fall in Montreal were usually mistakes (later, cynically cashing in on teenagers Screeching Weasel...nuff sed...but did occasionally lead to a great discovery, like the virtually unheard of Basement Brats from a town in nothern Norway). I sort of liked Pavement in high school, had a soft spot for Dinosaur, Jr., but was essentially ignorant of this "indie" thing. And also a little hostile. While hippies may seem the natural enemy of people who spend a lot of time listening to the Dead Boys, I think the real answer is indie kids: like our cooler, better looking cousins, I suppose I thought at the time.

And kind of still do. But that's another story.

But anyway, I had heard of this band "Guided by Voices" forever. I would occasionally observe one of their albums...probably Bee Thousand and Alien Lanes, actually, in Newbury Comics when I was heading in to buy, oh I don't know, another fucking Furious George 7 inch. I remember at the time I got them confused with God is My Copilot, and I'm pretty sure I mistakenly thought they were some pointless Kill Rock Stars band.

I still remember where and when I bought this album back in 1998, because it was in many ways my real entryway into the shit I've been listening to since then. I had a Pavement album or two, but this was probably my first really conscious indie purchase. I was at the HMV on Rue Sainte Catherine of all places in downtown Montreal (a/k/a my least favorite part of the whole city...), and I really wanted to hear something new. Forgive my very tinny sounding old man moment, but this was at a time where a quick sample on the internet to see what a band sounds like was either not possible, or I simply had no idea such a thing existed. I saw the cover of Alien Lanes, which always made me think they might be an Afro-fusion calypso band. But I decided to take the plunge anyway. It was either that or, I dunno, probably the Lillingtons or something, so I feel very confident I made the right decision.

I took the Metro back to my much-loathed first year residence on Lionel-Groulx (a street named after an infamous Quebecois Catholic anti-Semite, but I don't wanna talk about it), gingerly made my way through one of my roommate's coke and weed mountains (I may be mentally exaggerating, but I can no longer say for certain), and put this in my ol' trusty 3-CD changer.

The smell of stale roomie weed and crusted over Kraft dinner in the sink, and perhaps the sounds of this album were additionally joined by those of our apartment's fruitflies making love...

Disarm the settlers
the new drunk drivers
have hoisted the flag
we are with you in your anger
proud brothers
who do not fret
the bus will get you there yet
to carry us to the lake
the club is open
yeah, the club is open
hey hey, the club is open
c'mon, c'mon, the club is open
c'mon, c'mon, the club is open
c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, the club is open

"A Salty Salute" is not the best Guided by Voices song. Not by a long shot. I can't even imagine what my answer would be (although "Game of Pricks" or "My Fabulous Hunting Knife" off this record, "Quality of Armor" off 1992's Propeller, "I Am A Scientist" off Bee Thousand, "Drag Days" off Under the Bushes Under the Stars...you know what? Never mind.)

What was I saying? Oh yes, "A Salty Salute" is not the best GbV song. But it may be the best introduction. Short, anthemic...it sounds like something Pete Townshend should have written, if only the Who liked to record inside tin cans. While the lyrics printed above may cause the uninitiated to scratch their heads, the words of "A Salty Salute" also happen to make a hell of a lot more sense than those of the average Robert Pollard song. Enough so that you could actually get away with singing along without feeling embarrassed by the nearly meaningless gobbledy-gook coming out of your mouth.

By the way, I'm sure I'll get to this at some point in the future: Robert Pollard has some great tunes in him, but Tobin Sprout is one of the most underrated songwriters I can think of. In addition to loving most of his GbV material when he was in the band, I also own all of his solo work (generally spottier, but with some really great highlights).

Sorry to say this was again a 30 second clip. But the song is only about a minute long anyway, so it ain't such a big deal.

To sum up so far: v. I: "Disorder" by Joy Division; v. II: "I Just Wanna Have Something To Do" by The Ramones; v. III: "Ghost Rider" by Suicide; v. IV: "A Salty Salute" by Guided by Voices.