Even More Short Poems

sketches
if there was a yiddish version
of saturday night live
and i was a staff writer
i'd write a sketch called
Chef Goy-ardee
it would air at 12:55 AM
and illicit no laughs
but one very serious lawsuit
from the catholic league
i'd then write one called
"if vin diesel was a ganif"
and then get totally fired

daydreaming
when i daydream of shannyn sossamon
especially when she was in that piece of shit
"rules of attraction"
do you think she daydreams
of law students
with lactose intolerance
and blogger accounts?

lucky penny
penny penny
on the ground
you just doubled my gross income
for the 2007-2008 calendar year

memories
do you remember
when they cancelled nightline?
me neither.

grad school daze
if anyone in here
says
"gender through the prism of otherness"
one more time
i'm going to murder suicide
every motherfucker in this joint